An endeavour...

Yeah, am getting back to it…in fact trying to get back to it. WRITING…honestly I never left it; just the way you can’t leave you soul, even after you die. No matter what, you always hold on to your soul. You lose your structure, your body, every iota of the substance that envelope this soul…I think that’s when you do not lose yourself. ‘Cause that’s the only thing really left…your SOUL.
I know am not writing something that’s much of an eye-opener. I am somewhat writing because the more I distanced myself from this, the farther I got from my soul. I like being real. I like being ME and of course I like being the real Me. Every soul in this world is pure. Yes, untainted and beautiful and that’s why am trying to love each soul. Its not that I hated anybody but may be I never really loved everybody too. The entirety and magnificence of love brings the feeling of delight in me…and may be in you too. Ever thought of this?
Moving forward, I would say that today am not writing for anybody else. Instead am just writing for myself, for the girl I’ve always been.
I realize so many things from time to time. There’s a good deal to know about, a lot to learn, there’s so much to smile on and yes, there’s a lot to cry for as well. This one life is so full of everything; emotions-loads of them, expectations, desires, dreams, frustrations, apprehension, affection, hatred, pleasure, sorrow, splendor, aloofness and just everything else.
There are numerous things I still wanna learn. One day I want to learn ice-skating, the other day its sketching; the third day I wanna learn how to play a guitar, the next day I wanna ride a horse and this desire and wish of learning goes on. In the same way, there are several things I wanna dream about. Truly, I want to set myself free. I want to leave behind the losses of the past, I don’t want to look forward to the uncertainties of the future; and what can I say about the present? About this little moment that am holding right now? Yes, I know it. In the present, I just wanna SMILE :)

Someday, the sunbeams will make me warm
The clouds will send those drops of rain;
The breeze will touch me and it’ll touch my soul
And life would not be so mundane.
I wish to see my dreams
With a clear and unbiased view,
I wish to fall in love with love
And refrain from all the things untrue.
I hope to hope for beauty
For being just pure at heart,
Feeling the sunbeams, the raindrops, the breeze
And being myself for the most part.

A desire to achieve, a desire to conquer...
A wish to laugh and smile all along;
A desire that ties you to a grasping world
To which your soul does not belong.

Our world, our life, our thoughts, our wishes....they all concentrically move around our desires. There is always a "longing"...a wish...a need...which is constantly working as an invisible force to separate us from our soul. Our desires are thus the devils which solely focus on disconnecting our thoughts and our deeds from the real "us" thats lying deep within ourselves. The gradually changing world endeavours to arouse in us a materialistic approach towards the lives we are "living"...
A desire to achieve the best, a desire to win, a desire to be admired, a desire to be content, a desire to be loved...and this is how we fail to realise how these desires are overpowering our innocent dreams, our untainted thoughts and our free soul...

I close my eyes to avoid the truth
I divert my thoughts to accomplish my desire...
But sometimes the flame of passion and zeal
Alters into an uncontrollable fire...
Its all in my hands,
Its all in my heart...
The real fiend thats tearing my soul apart...

I do not want my desires to bind me to a life that was never mine...I do not want my wishes to capture me in a frame that would change my soul...
To "desire" is important...because our desires when combined with a positive spirit tend to bring in our lives a pleasure filled with purity...the smiles that can wipe away the tears all around. I know life is not spun around these smiles and tears, desires and sacrifices...but the life that God gave us is supposed to concentrate on the desire to "serve others"...these thoughts are deep, confusing, complicated, hard and may be even impractical but holding on to our real selves till the end is the most prominent challenge that life puts forth us and the people who believe in this turn out to be the real heroes because they make an effort to accomplish their desires without malice in their hearts and alteration in their souls...

It all depends on ur take on life, how u see life, what u want to make out of it, ur desires, the reason hidden behind them, the means you take to achieve them, ur beliefs, ur deeds, ur wisdom, ur heart and ur soul...

Desire to love without an expectation,
Desire to spread cheer and kindle the spirit within;
Desire to know urself better
And bring transparency in ur vision...
To desire is a natural trend
A way on the path to your goal,
What matters is how you shape ur desires
So that they work towards sanitizing your soul...